PARASAILING WAS FUN!!!

I WONDER WHAT'S NEXT? ZIP LINING MAYBE???



Friday, May 29, 2009

One of my favorite youtube videos

This is one of my all-time favorite versions of Somewhere Over The Rainbow.

Israel Kamakawiwo'ole was a Hawaiian man who had a real gift for music. He passed away in 1997 at the age of 38. This video and others like it are all over Youtube, 12 years after his death. A real testament to his talent. Enjoy.


Thursday, May 28, 2009

Best Neighbors in the World! Also graduation and 20 years

I have, without a doubt, the best neighbors in the world!

You know all the weird little troubles I've been having here with the house. Well, yesterday, John (best boyfriend in the world!) bought me a new sump pump. Tonight, my next door neighbor, Steve came over and installed it for me. Tomorrow I can get down there and get rid of all the lovely mildew that is growing up all the walls in my basement and get the rest of the water out of there. My de-humifier is going like crazy. Soon I will have a dry, non-stinky basement!

His wife, Kris, came over earlier and tried to get my cable box hooked up properly, but we have had no luck. Steve tried his hand at it too, but with no luck. Damned Comcast! Tomorrow I have to call them to have someone come out and install my cable box for me. I down-graded from hi-def digital cable to regular digital cable. I also got rid of all my premium channels and my phone line. I unhooked the cable box and brought it back to the office and picked up the regular one. This was 2 weeks ago. No luck. So today I brought it back and got another one. Still no luck. I have so many wires behind the TV, I can't tell what goes where any more! Guess it's time to call in the professionals.

Now if I can just find someone who knows how to fix dryers for free.


Today, Dani came home from school as I was getting ready for work. She stopped on the walkway, looked up (I was in my bedroom) and said, "I am finished with high school!" And I looked down and proclaimed, "So am I!!" Halleluiah!

I have been sending my kids to Catholic school for 20 years! (Gina even went to a Catholic college, so she was 17 years in the system!) Twenty years of Catholic School tuition, 20 years of uniforms and shirts and ties. Twenty years of making sure books were always covered. Tweny years of servicable shoes. Twenty years of nuns and priests and permission slips and detention. Twenty years of having to hide piercings (Dani), wearing illegal pants (Gina), and having hair too long (Tim). We were in the grade school for 16 years. After 16 years, there are no secrets. They know EVERYTHING abut you. Sixteen years is way too long to have kids in one school. We were 11 years in the high school. That didn't seem so bad. Each kid was in grade school for 9 years, the high school only 4 years. But as of today, we're finished. FOREVER!!!!

All that's left to do is attend the Baccalaureate Mass on Monday evening and graduation on Tueday morning. Then I get to go to lunch with my newly graduated daughter, my son, my daughter's friend and my ex-husband. He asked me to find a place near the college where the graduation is to be held and make a reservation. So I did. I chose a 4 star restaurant! Ka-ching!!! I will not be paying the bill. :)


UPDATE:
John had some tests done in preparation for his chemo treatments. The pulmonary test was good. Apparently he has really good lungs. On Tuesday he has a scan done and an ultrasound. Still waiting onther esults fo the MUGA, which is a heart scan. The ultrasound was to check his left testicle. Apparently he was having some pain there and they wanted to make sure there were no masses there. Fortunately they found nothing. The enlarged lymph nodes in his groin are causing the pain and for some reason he's feeling it in his testicle. He's scheduled for his bone marrow biopsy on Monday. I knew we were going to run into some conflicts with our schedules. I can't take him for the biopsy because it's the same day as Baccalaureate. Mass is at 7 pm, but I have to ready to go by 5:30 because Dani has to be there by 6:30. I can't take the chance that I can be back in time. So John is on his own for this. I sure hope they don't schedule one of his chemo treatments on the 15th of 16th of June. Those are the days I have to take Dani to the college for orientation and it's 5 hours from here.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

A Kid's Eye View Of The Bible


Can you imagine yourself to be the nun who is sitting at her desk grading these papers all the while trying to keep a straight face and maintain her composure!

Pay special attention to the wording and the spelling. It comes from a Catholic Elementary School test. Kids were asked questions about the Old Testament and the New Testament. The following statements about the Bible were written by children. They have not been retouched or corrected. Incorrect spelling has been left in.


1. IN THE FIRST BOOK OF THE BIBLE, GUINESSIS. GOD GOT TIRED OF CREATING THE WORLD SO HE TOOK THE SABBATH OFF.


2. ADAM AND EVE WERE CREATED FROM AN APPLE TREE. NOAH'S WIFE WAS JOAN OF
ARK. NOAH BUILT THE ARK AND THE ANIMALS CAME ON IN PEARS.

3. LOTS WIFE WAS A PILLAR OF SALT DURING THE DAY, BUT A BALL OF FIRE DURING
THE NIGHT

4. THE JEWS WERE A PROUD PEOPLE AND THROUGHOUT HISTORY THEY HAD TROUBLE WITH UNSYMPATHETIC GENITALS.


5. SAMPSON WAS A STRONGMAN WHO LET HIMSELF BE LED ASTRAY BY A JEZEBEL LIKE DELILAH.


6. SAMSON SLAYED THE PHILISTINES WITH THE AXE OF THE APOSTLES.


7. MOSES LED THE JEWS TO THE RED SEA WHERE THEY MADE UNLEAVENED BREAD WHICH IS BREAD WITHOUT ANY INGREDIENTS .


8. THE EGYPTIANS WERE ALL DROWNED IN THE DESSERT. AFTERWARDS, MOSES WENT UP TO MOUNT CYANIDE TO GET THE TEN COMMANDMENTS.

9. THE FIRST COMMANDMENTS WAS WHEN EVE TOLD ADAM TO EAT THE APPLE.


10. THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT IS THOU SHALT NOT ADMIT ADULTERY.


11. MOSES DIED BEFORE HE EVER REACHED CANADA. THEN JOSHUA LED THE HEBREWS IN THE BATTLE OF GERITOL.


12. THE GREATEST MIRICLE IN THE BIBLE IS WHEN JOSHUA TOLD HIS SON TO STAND
STILL AND HE OBEYED HIM.

13. DAVID WAS A HEBREW KING WHO WAS SKILLED AT PLAYING THE LIAR. HE FOUGHT THE FINKELSTEINS, A RACE OF PEOPLE WHO LIVED IN BIBLICAL TIMES.


14. SOLOMON, ONE OF DAVIDS SONS, HAD 300 WIVES AND 700 PORCUPINES.


15. WHEN MARY HEARD SHE WAS THE MOTHER OF JESUS, SHE SANG THE MAGNA CARTA.


16. WHEN THE THREE WISE GUYS FROM THE EAST SIDE ARRIVED THEY FOUND JESUS IN THE MANAGER.


17. JESUS WAS BORN BECAUSE MARY HAD AN IMMACULATE! CONTRAPTION.


18. ST. JOHN THE BLACKSMITH DUMPED WATER ON HIS HEAD.


19. JESUS ENUNCIATED THE GOLDEN RULE, WHICH SAYS TO DO UNTO OTHERS BEFORE THEY DO ONE TO YOU. HE ALSO EXPLAINED A MAN DOTH NOT LIVE BY SWEAT ALONE.


20. IT WAS A MIRICLE WHEN JESUS ROSE FROM THE DEAD AND MANAGED TO GET THE TOMBSTONE OFF THE ENTRANCE.


21. THE PEOPLE WHO FOLLOWED THE LORD WERE CALLED THE 12 DECIBELS.


22. THE EPISTELS WERE THE WIVES OF THE APOSTLES.


23. ONE OF THE OPPOSSUMS WAS ST. MATTHEW WHO WAS ALSO A TAXIMAN.


24. ST. PAUL CAVORTED TO CHRISTIANITY, HE PREACHED HOLY ACRIMONY WHICH IS
ANOTHER NAME FOR MARRAIGE.

25. CHRISTIANS HAVE ONLY ONE SPOUSE. THIS IS CALLED MONOTONY.

Spin Cycle: Dating: Breaking all the rules


OK, Garret, this is a repeat, just to warn you. :)

I had to learn to be single again. After being married for 23 years and together with my ex for 27 years, I found myself suddenly single. It was NOT a journey I was ready, willing or able to take! I was married for so long, I didn't know how to be single!

Where in the hell does a nearly 50 year old woman go to meet men her age?


I re-joined a bowling league after not bowling for nearly 10 years. I joined a mixed league. I sucked at bowling. I used to be a fairly decent bowler. My average on my return was 110 and it never got any better. The good guys in the league were all married and their wives were also on the league (not that I'd go after a married guy! hell, that's why I'm not married any more. someone didn't care about marital status) The unmarried guys were either too young, too old or just not for me. I stuck it out for the remainder to the year but didn't go back.


NOW what do I do?


I'd been playing with match.com and yahoo personals and basically finding married guys who want to have sex with any female who isn't their wife.


Or the scammers who are widowed (wife always dies tragically in a car crash) with a young teenage son, and has a great job... only right now he's in West Africa. sigh. I found tons of them.


Then I fell onto a site call True Beginnings. I don't even know how I found it. Free for 3 days. I was on there for about 3 months, I think. I got my weekly list of 12 or so guys who fit my criteria. I was always way too insecure to make any first moves!


Then one night, I get an email from a prospect. He tells me "Thanks for the wink." uh. wink? I didn't send anyone a wink. So, for fun, I check him out. Raised catholic, one of 7 kids, retired Army, 2 boys, 1 girl, lives in my county, getting divorced. Not looking for a relationship, just wants to have fun. He's the opposite of me!


So I reply to the email. Um, I didn't send you a wink, but Hi! We email back and forth for a few weeks. We try to get in a private chat room to talk, but we can't get it working.

So, he says here's my HOME PHONE NUMBER! Call me! Home phone number is HUGE! Home phone number means he most likely really is getting divorced!
So after a few days of being nervous, I call him. We talk on the phone for 3+ hours! He has so many stories! He seems really interesting. We do the phone thing for a few weeks, each time tying up the line for 1.5+ hrs each time.

After a couple of weeks of this, we decide to meet. I tell him, this is where I work. You can come in and if you don't like what you see, you can leave and I'll never know you were there.
So, one Saturday, the hostess says, "Joan, you had a request." I go to the table, and it's him! He looks a lot like his photo. He orders a drink and a snack and I sit and chat when I can.

He asks me out for dinner and a movie, that night. Ok, but I need to go home and get changed.


This is where I break all the rules. I allowed him to follow me home. Then, I go upstairs and take a shower! As I get in the shower, I'm thinking, JOAN! WTF is wrong with you?? I'm quick about getting ready. I go back downstairs and there he is, right where I left him! A gentleman! I breathe a big sigh of relief.

So we decide that I'll drive since I know the area. Dinner at Red Lobster and a afterwards, a movie (The Night Talker with Robin Williams). At the movies, he holds my hand. I like this.


We go back to my house and again, I invite him in because it's still fairly early. We watch (ok, we sort of watched) V For Vendetta. He kissed me. ZING!! I don't know if it's because it's been a while since a man kissed me but WOW!! I'm really liking this!
That night, except for when my teenager came in and completely freaked out, we ended up talking until nearly 4 am.


We've been together ever since. August 5 will be 3 years. I thought I wanted to just meet someone and get married again because that's what I knew. Now? I'm in no hurry. I don't want to lose my spousal support (aka alimony... I earned it! just the 6 years I worked for my ex for no pay alone qualifies). Also, if I wait until after I turn 60 (which is less than a year after the support runs out) I'll still get the ex's social security which is twice what I'd get for mine.

So this arrangement is working fine, except I wish we lived closer.
If I had to do anything over again, I'd have not invited John to my house for several months. I'd have kept him and my teenager apart for a while. Who know? Maybe she wouldn't hate him so much if I had done that? Nah.

Hey! Want to join in the fun? Why not check out Sprite's Keeper for details. Jen gives us a topic each Friday and we have a week to spin a tale about whatever she wants to talk about! She posts links to everyone's spin on Friday so you can read what other people have to say!

Monday, May 25, 2009

Things that make me cry

I'm reading blogs this morning before heading off to work (yes, I have to work on Memorial Day), and some folks are writing about or just putting pictures up to honor the men and women who fought and died for our country over the years. It's making tears well up in my eyes. So it got me thinking about all the things (some really silly) that make me cry and the surprising things that don't.

Comedy Goddess was writing about watching a parade and how she welled up seeing a WW II vet being honored for his service. I remembered that parades make me cry! I know! It's silly! Thanksgiving Day parades, New Year's parades, Memorial Day parades, 4th of July parades. The floats go by, the scout troops, the kids on decorated bikes.... and here I am with a huge lump in my throat! I don't know what it is!


Other things that make me cry.


Christmas Carols sung in church. The choir starts up and my throat closes up.


Seeing Relay For Life teams, all in the same shirt in honor or or in memory of a certain person. I was waiting for a table in a diner on Mother's Day and Philly had their Race For The Cure. There were several families also waiting for tables and everyone had identical shirts on, and I'm sitting there like a blubbering idiot, trying desperately not to cry.

Spending the day at the Relay For Life in our town last year, and listening to the speeches and watching the survivors, all wearing their purple shirts, doing their lap. Watching John walk by in his shirt, so proud to be counted with the other survivors. (It's the ONLY time I'll ever get that man to wear purple! LOL)

Hearing the recording of my daughter, Gina singing Somewhere Over The Rainbow in her clear 16 year old voice. I heard that kid rehearse that song over and over. I probably had to hear it 20 times before I could get through it without choking up. It's been 8 years since her high school did that play and if I put the video on, I get choked up all over again. God! That girl can sing and act like nobody's business!

Some movies make me cry. Of course, now I'm blank on which ones will. It's not the ones you'd think though. Not movies like Sleepless in Seattle and other sappy chick flicks. If I think of them, I'll add them, just for fun.


John, big tough soldier John cries at the drop of a hat at movies. He never used to though. but as he gets older, he's turning into an old softy and movies that don't affect me at all have him sitting there with tears streaming down his face. I think it's sweet and he's glad I don't make fun of him.


My youngest kid is graduating from high school next Tuesday. I'm not sure if I'll cry during that ceremony. We'll see.

Speaking of Memorial Day, I want to remember my Uncle Francie Curry who was a gunner and died when his plane went down in Italy during WW II. He's buried at Anzio, Italy.

So, what sets your waterworks starting? C'mon! You can tell me! I won't tell anyone. I swear!

Friday, May 22, 2009

Stupid Neo Counter

I've had the Neo Counter for a while now and I really like it. It's fun to see folks from around the world who stop by my blog. But lately, it's been going a bit goofy. It counts me whenever I log into my blog, which is fine. For the past week or so, it's telling me that I'm logging in from Hightstown, NJ. Uh... I live in Pottstown, PA. Across the Delaware River from NJ. I don't DO NJ any more. The ex lives in NJ with his future ex-wife.

I want to fix this stupid error but I have no idea how to do it! I was having a little problem with the Live feed on several of your blogs this week. It thought I was in York, PA (2 hours northwest of me) but I was able to fix that. I just had to change my location. But with the Neo Counter, I can't find anywhere that I can change my location!

Does anyone have any ideas? I know it's silly. I know it's minor. But I don't live in NJ. I haven't lived in NJ for 20 years! I have no desire for anyone to think I might be in NJ (No offense to NJ-ites. I lived there for 3 years and never liked it. I was glad to be back in good ol' PA)

Blogger Problem. anyone else??

Is it just me or is anyone else out there having problems reading blogs in the last couple of days? Every time I open a blog, I get a message that reads:
INTERNET EXPLORER CANNOT OPEN THIS INERNET SITE (then it gives the site name) OPERATION ABORTED.

This is happening repeatedly. It's driving me crazy!!! I went in and did a disc clean up, de fragged the computer, deleted all the extra junk, hoping that would stop it but it didn't.

As far as I know, it's only happening in blogger. I sure hope it's blogger's problem and not mine. I have enough bad crap going on around me without my computer going on the fritz.

UPDATE; Thanks to Dena, I switched over to Mozilla Foxfire and now everything is working fine. Thanks!!!

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Wordless Wednesday

Well, almost wordless. These are some things I really need right now!








This is my first time doing Wordless Wednesday. Check out 5 Minutes For Mom for more!

Monday, May 18, 2009

R-ICE Scary as hell!

I'm not talking about Uncle Ben's Converted Rice or brown rice or long-grain and wild rice or even Basmati rice. I'm talking about the acronym for a really really scary cancer treatment that John is about to undertake.

John had an appointment at the Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania today. He was there to discuss his options for the next dose of treatment to get rid of the cancer that keeps showing up in his body, in his lymph nodes.

I wanted to go with him, but with the economy the way it is, I simply can't afford to take any extra time off right now.

Before any treatments start, John has to get a MUGA done. MUGA is a scan of the heart to make sure his heart can withstand the chemo he'll be receiving. He'll be getting this done next Tuesday, May 26.

He also needs to have a bone marrow biopsy done to make sure his marrow is good. Not fun. This is very painful. Why they don't sedate you for this I can't understand.

OK, so back to R-ICE. This is a treatment designed to fight Lymphoma (the non-Hodgkins variety). It stands for:

R- Rituximab ... John had Rituxan with his first round of chemo 2 years ago, This stuff kills the cancer cells while leaving the good cells alone (cool stuff!) and allows the body to rebuild the white cells.

I-Ifosfamide
C-Carboplatin
E-Etoposide

*I don't know what these drugs do, exactly, but give me some time and I'll learn all abou them.

These are given via IV. I guess John will have to have another port (permanent IV line) installed in his chest.

He is to get 2 treatments of RICE which should put him in remission. Then they'll harvest his own stem cells. Then he has to get a really high dose of RICE that will make him really sick. At some point, they'll begin to replace his own stem calls back into his body. If this treatment doesn't kill him, it should put him in remission, hopefully for good.

He has a very long hard tough summer ahead of him. The last dose of RICE and the stem cell work will keep him in the hospital for a month... in Philly, 40 miles from here. This is going to be long tough hard road for me too. The earlier treatments I can handle with work, but that month in the hospital is going to be very hard for me to do. Luckily I have 3 weeks vacation this year and I plan to take a week when he gets out of the hospital and comes here for recuperation. Dani should be at school by then so that shouldn't be a problem. If not, she's just going to have to deal with it.

John's worried about his job. Will he be able to take the better part of the summer off and still have a job to come back to in September? He was told his treatments should be finished and he should be able to resume his normal daily life.

One of the downsides of this treatment is in 10 or 20 years, he may get another kind of cancer. The alternative is he gets sicker and sicker and dies. So he's going to go ahead with this treatment. He trusts Dr. Swaab implicitly. Unfortunately, our cancer center doesn't do the R-ICE treatment, so he HAS to go to U of P Hospital. The doctor who John saw today was one of the doctor's that Dr. Swaab trained under, so John felt better about it. My niece is a recovery room nurse U of P Hospital. I'll have to talk to her soon.

It's important that we both stay VERY positive during this time. John was very lucky that he handled the chemo treatments 2 years ago with relative ease. He was able to work through it. This time it's going to be much tougher and he'll be sicker. But John's a tough old bird and I have a feeling he'll come out of this really well!

When I know more, I'll be sure to keep everyone posted.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

The Ten Tenors


Yesterday my daughter, Gina called me and asked me if I wanted to see a show with her that evening in Wilmington, DE. She works for a radio station (well 2 stations actually). They often get FREE tickets to cool events like concerts and plays and baseball, hockey and football games. Whoever the person who is in charge of the tickets knows if it's theatre, Gina will use the tickets. Same can be said for Phillies or Eagles tickets.

So I drive down to Wilmington and The Ten Tenors are performing at the DuPont Hotel in downtown Wilmington. We're 30 minutes late (grrr!!! all Dani's fault) but we got to see 3/4 of the show and the tickets are free so no real complaints there!

Oh my!!! The Ten Tenors are ten totally hot specimens very talented young men from Australia. And oh man! Can they sing! They performed some classical pieces, songs from the 60s, 70s and 80s, songs about Australia. One of my favorite numbers was Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen. The lights went down and when they came up, only their faces were illuminated and they were standing in a diamond, like Queen did on their video. It was great!

Can I just say that Australia can turn out some pretty hot guys and they have talents out the wazoo too! Hugh Jackman, Mel Gibson (although he was born in NY), Jonathon and Anthony La Paglia, Heath Ledger, Brian Brown, Keith Urban and these 10 fellows just to name a few.

OK, I know they also have Nicole Kidman and Olivia Newton John but I'm concentrating on the guys here.

So if The Ten Tenors happen to be performing in your area. Go see them. You won't be disappointed.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Spin Cycle: Pets: My 3 Sons


Growing up and the entire time I was married, we were not allowed to have any pets. My kids begged us for a kitten. But it was always no, no pets. The ex finally relented, somewhat from time to time.We did have 3 Budgebriars (blue parakeets) . First we got Lizzie for Gina for Christmas one year. One day Dani came flying into the family room, throwing the French doors wide open. This caused the cage to fall over and Lizzie literally flew the coop. Bye Lizzie! Some time later, we got 2 more parakeets. We named them Laverne and Shirley. Laverne and Shirley died, but I don't know why.

Next in our pet adventures, Gina's boyfriend at the time, Richard raised rabbits for 4H Club. He gave one to Gina. I can't remember what she named him. Gina swears this rabbit was Bunnicula! (anyone familiar with the author James Howe knows he had a series of children's books about Bunnicula, the vampire bunny) He kept trying to bite her (he was probably hungry.) The rabbit lived in a cage in the garage. We had him for several months. One day, I went in and the bunny was stiff as a board, dead as a doornail.

Of course, we had our fair share of fish in a very nice fish tank. Died. All of them. Every time we got some. We really were not a pet family. It was clear pets were doomed as soon as they entered our front door.

So, we didn't have any pets for a long time. The kids' dad made up some lame ass story about being allergic and that's why we never had cats or dogs.

Then, the asshole ex-husand left in January 2005. He hates cats. I thought a kitty would make a nice replacement for the ex. That summer Danielle wore me down and we were off to Diane's Pets to look at kittens. There were 2 gray striped tabbies in the cage, brothers. Of course, we didn't know which one to choose. Dani even said, "Which one should we get?" With that, Cameron hopped up, trotted over to the door of the cage and we had our very first kitty! My son named him. So, we get Cam home and everyone is happy. I can't get the other kitty out of my head, leaving him at the pet shop, all alone. So a day or so later, I go back to get the other kitten but he's already been adopted. That's ok. I only wanted one cat anyway.

About 3 months go by. Dani and I head out to the new Petsmart store that just opened up down the road. We need "stuff" for Cameron. I didn't realize this, but Petsmart has a "Cat Angel Network", an adoption center for cats. So I'm busy picking up a collar and kitty toys and stuff and Dani drags me over to see this adorable little black kitty who is about 3 months old. "Please, please, please, Mom! Look how cute he is!!! We really need to bring this kitty home! Please Mom!"

Sigh. (can you see the "pushover" sign on my forehead?)

So we inquire about the kitty, whose name is Mason. Well, Mason is part of a pair of cats that are supposed to be adopted together. His brother (a gray striped tabby, obviously not his biological brother) has the name Dixon. I tell the lady that I don't want 2 cats. I already have a cat at home. She takes my name and number, "just in case".

About a week goes by and I get a call from the Cat lady, telling me that there's a lady who wants to adopt Dixon, who already has a cat. She thought since each kitty will have a sibling at the new homes, we can adopt Mason. So, off we go to Petsmart to get Mason and bring him home.

At this point in time, Cameron is about 5 months old and Mason is 3 months old. We bring Mason in, and let Cameron see him. Cam sniffs him and sniffs him and proceeds to chase this poor little kitty all over the house! Poor terrfified Mason runs up inside my sofa, which is also 2 recliners. No way in hell was this kitty coming out! I had to cut the back of my sofa open to get to him!

For the better part of 3 days, Mason lives in my office, just off the family room while Cameron has the run of the house. Finally I decide this is ridiculous. I let Mason out of the room and told them they're just going to have to learn to get along. And they do.

The 2 cats are funny. Cameron almost always goes out the front door and goes out mostly in the daytime. Mason will use the family room door and mostly goes out at night.

Two years go by and the 2 cats are getting along most of the time. They're typical brothers who will roll around and snarl and fight sometimes. Mostly they ignore each other.

Last summer, I went to my nail salon to get my nails done and Sam is standing there, with this teensy little kitty in his arms. He talks me into holding him while he does my nails. The kitty is only 2 or 3 weeks old and his mother died. He was found at their mechanic's garage. He's brown with blue eyes. So dummy me takes him home. He's so small, I have to bottle feed him EVERY TWO OR THREE HOURS!!! And I have to teach him to use the litter box and teach him how to poop. For the record, since I don't have that rough tongue that cats have and no way in hell am I putting my mouth anywhere near this kitty's ass, I use a wet paper towel to "stimulate" him. It works. He's litter trained in about 3 days.

I had to bathe him in my kitchen sink with Dawn dish liquid and discover not only is he not brown but black but he's loaded with fleas!!! So he got several baths that first couple of weeks.
Gina's boyfriend, Gene suggested we name him Java because he's the color of black coffee. (actually his first idea was Juan Valdez). The vet confirms he's a boy.

Java is so small that I keep him in my bedroom and bathroom, away from the other 2 cats for several months, until he can defend himself. Cameron doesn't like him and mason (the big sissy) runs from him. I even had to take him to John's with me on the weekends and he also went to Ocean City, MD with us last October.

Now Java likes to travel in the car and he also hops into the shower with me sometimes.

I haven't gotten Java neutered yet because other more pressing bills came up, so he's now sowing his wild oats all over our neighborhood! He disappears for days on end and he's very cocky now. I used to worry about him but I don't any more.

So now I have 3 male cats. I'm afraid I'm turning into a Cat lady. They really are very friendly cats. I'm surprised how much I like them! I never thought of myself as a cat person, but apparently I am!

Hey! Want to join in the fun? Why not check out Sprite's Keeper for details. Jen gives us a topic each Friday and we have a week to spin a tale about whatever she wants to talk about! She posts everyone's spin on Friday so you can read what other people have to say!

Why Women Shouldn't Take Men Shopping

WHY WOMEN SHOULDN'T TAKE MEN SHOPPING

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips toTarget. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women -she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Target.



Dear Mrs.Samsel,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Samsel, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking .

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,"Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away." This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

And last, but not least:

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper!" One of the clerks passed out.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Best PMS Question EVER!

Best PMS Question Ever

Q: How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?

Woman's Answer: One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY?

Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb!

They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!!

They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out.

And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to

find the #&%!*light bulbs despite the fact

that they've been in the SAME CABINET for

the past 17 YEARS!

But if they did, by some miracle of God,

actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER,

the chair they dragged to stand on to change

the STUPID light bulb would


STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!!


AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER

THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!!

BECAUSE NO ONE EVER PICKS UP OR

CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!!

IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED

FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE A

FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!!

IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE!

AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON

WHO CHANGES THE TOILET PAPER ROLL !!

I'm sorry. What was the question?

Monday, May 11, 2009

Spin Cycle: Prom Night, Color My World 1973




Color My World (by Chicago aka Chicago Transit Authority) That was the theme of my prom. Oh, Good Lord! This picture is so so funny! This is a picture of my sister, Jeanne in blue and me in lavender, going to my prom in 1973. Jeanne is 15 and she borrowed the dress from our friend, Denise, who wore it in her sister's wedding a year or so before. I was in our brother, Michael's wedding the year before, so I wore that dress to the prom. I am 17 in this photo. Jeanne was dating Ed, who she later married (then divorced 5 years later) and I was dating Kevin (we never married. A few years later he dumped me for his boss's daughter. My mother was THRILLED!))

I don't have a lot of memories from the prom. I can't tell you the date or where the prom was held. Most likely, a local hotel ballroom because there were nearly 1000 kids in my class! I do remember that the prom was held on a MONDAY NIGHT! How stupid is that? It was the day after Easter and we had off the next day (Catholic school, you always have off the day after Easter). Oh duh! I just realized I can google it! The prom was on April 23, 1973. As you will see in the picture below, Kevin wore a lavender tuxedo to match my dress. I was dorky enough to wear the hat and gloves that I wore in the wedding!

As I said, Jeanne borrowed her dress from Denise. When we arrived at the prom, we discovered that Mr. Maguire's (English teacher- 20th Century Fiction) wife (they were chaperones) had on the same dress that Jeanne was wearing!!! OMG! Jeanne was MORTIFIED!! I thought it was hysterical and thanking the good Lord that it wasn't MY dress she had duplicated. I was happy that Terry (Michael's wife's sister, who was also in the wedding) didn't wear her dress to the prom. Although, years later, our niece was getting married and Terry and I were wearing the same exact dress! She bought hers in Boston and I bought mine in Pennsylvania! Well, we spent 12 years going to the same Catholic schools. I guess it was not unusual that were still dressing alike! LOL


It's funny to see these pictures. Ed is now extremely fat and bald. He has 2 divorces under his belt and has been living with the same woman for about 20 years now. Jeanne is not the skinny little bitch she was in high school, although she's smaller than me. I'll admit to a smile of satisfaction a few years ago, when I saw that my kid sister is now sporting a fat ass now! Kevin went on to marry the boss's daughter, had 2 sons and died at the ripe old age of 35. Me? I'm now fat and sassy, with a divorce under my own belt and a great fellow in my heart, and waiting to get my life back in August when my youngest leaves for college on the other side of the state!

Want to join in the Spin Cycle fun? The one, the only Jen! At Sprite's Keeper! Spin Cycle is all her idea and it's lots of fun! Why not go on over and check out the other spins? Each week she gives us a topic to write a cool, funny, serious story. That link will give you the rules! Go on! It's fun!

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Live Long and Prosper


John and I just returned from seeing Star Trek. It's awesome! Go see it!

To appreciate it, it helps to have seen at least some of the original series and a few of the movies. These actors have the original cast members' mannerisms and at times, voices, down pat! Lots of action, some humor, a few surprises, some artistic license too. We really enjoyed this movie!

Friday, May 8, 2009

My New Job





My 1-day employment

So after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter,

a good find for many retirees,

I lasted less than a day......

About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, unattractive,

mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids,

yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

As I had been instructed, I said pleasantly,

'Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart.

Nice children you have there. Are they twins?

'The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, '

Hell no, they ain't twins.

The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7.

Why the hell would you think they're twins?

Are you blind, or just stupid?'

So I replied, 'I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am,

I just couldn't believe someone slept with you twice.

Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.'

My supervisor said I probably wasn't cut out for this line of work.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Hell Week

I'm not talking about college fraternity hazing or tech week at the high school, just before their musical opens (although high school hell week is mega-stressful!!!) This one is my very own personal hell week. So, yes, this a mega-rant and feel free to skip right over it.


First up: the monetary part of hell week.


I somehow need to come up with $700 before the end of the month to pay for the money I still owe my kid's high school in order for her to graduate. If you don't put a minimum of $500 a year in the church collection, they tack on $1000 to the already high ($4250) tuition for participating members of the Catholic community (the parish pays that $1000 if you put in the collection). And since I haven't been to Church in a few years, since my divorce, they tacked it on. And I don't remember getting any kind of notification about it. shit!


I have an $1800 car insurance payment due by the end of the month also. My ex pays half of the kids' car insurance but I still have to come up with the rest. I can split the payment in half and pay some by the end of May and the rest in July, I think.


I just cancelled my mega-cheap week at Ocean City, MD because of the 2 items above. Fortunately, I rent from my good friend and former neighbor, so I'm not penalized for cancelling. She suggested I come down in September, after Labor Day. She says the water is warmer, restaurants have all kinds of deals since it's off-season and she'll give me a super duper deal on the house! So, John and I are thinking about it. Plus, we'll split the cost of the rent and stuff.


Next up: oh-so-fun Health Issues


My health insurance is ridiculously high and I'm seriously thinking about seeing if I qualify for medic-aid. Since I had a physical last month and discovered that I'm falling apart and need all kinds of meds, I think I need to address this. She wants me to have all these tests done and I'm pretty sure my insurance isn't going to cover all of it. I swear to God, if I wasn't afraid I'd lose my alimony, I'd marry John for his health insurance! Oh, that sounds terrible! Actually the only reason we don't get married is because I'd lose 5 years of alimony and I earned that money!!!


As you can read from the previous post, John's cancer is back. He has 2 lymph nodes in his groin (but not his prostate) that are acting up. He's going to need more chemo, most likely and they'll harvest his stem cells and inject them into the nodes. His regular oncologist wants him to see the specialist at U of PA first, but she's on maternity leave and the doctor who is covering can't see him until July!!! Hello!!! This isn't a check-up! This is cancer that keeps coming back! Who knows what will happen by July!


The same night that John found out about the cancer returning, I was heading up to bed and the cat wanted out. So I put down my book and my water bottle and let him out. The lights were out but the light was on in the bathroom at the top of the stairs, so it wasn't pitch black. I start up the steps, but can't find my book and bottle. I turned around to go down and turn the light back on when stupid me forgot I was 4 or 5 steps up and promptly, stepped off into nothing and fell down 3 or 4 stairs. I landed on my bad right side (arthritis in my right hip and leg), landed on my left hand and whacked my head on the wall. So I have a lump on my head and it hurts to touch it, my left hand along my pinky is sore to the touch and my right side from my hip to below my knee hurts. My neck is sore a little too. stupid, stupid, stupid.


Next up: miscellaneous shit that just happens to me


A few weeks ago, my dryer decided it didn't want to work any more and of course, I don't have the money to buy a new one. (see all the shit above for reference) So I decide to see if I can fix it myself!

I get the how-to book out. I'm hoping it's just the belt. (where are Jim and Garret when I really need them? Jim is sooo handy at fixing things! Soaking up the sun in Arizona!) It's not the belt. I haven't had the energy to see what else it might be, so the dryer is in the basement, on it's side, with the top and the back off.


The dryer wouldn't be too too bad except that it's been raining for 8 or 9 days now, on and off every day, and my basement flooded not once, but twice this week! My sump pump must have shifted as the water rose and it wasn't pumping water out. So I had to go downstairs and wade through 5 inches of cold cold water and retrieve the cats' litter box and bring it upstairs because the cats weren't too happy to have to swim across the basement to poop. Then, I jiggled the sump pump and it started to pump the water out of the basement. So I have a dryer that is apart and partially under water, various clothing items of my kids floating around. And a few other fun things. The walls are beginning to mildew, so when it finally stops raining and flooding, I'll have to go around the whole fucking basement with a spray bottle of bleach water and get rid of all the black marks that are showing up on my walls.


Last night, I was at John's for the night, like I do every Wednesday, and they are flashing flood warning for the entire SE PA and NJ area. Great. I get home in the morning and of course, there is another 5 inches of water in my basement because the pump shifted again. So I wade across the basement again, do the jiggling thing and the water pumped out while I was at work.


I can't really fix the pump until there's no water in the hole that the pump sits in. so I have to wait for that and hope I'm home when the next big rain hits and I can try to ward off the flooding at the pass (and also hope we don't lose power)

I made some changes to my comcast account to lower my bill. Got rid of my house phone and all my premium channels and switched up the High def box to a regular digital box. Now I can't get the remote to recognize the TV or the cable box. I also can't get someone who speaks English to help me! And Dani just informed me in her oh-so-sweet (not) voice that the wireless router doesn't work and she can't get internet on her laptop.

Diabetes or not, I'm having the rest of that bottle of wine tonight!

I just want to know when the Karma is going to work in MY favor and not in my ex's favor. That bastard comes up smelling like rose very time and I'm wallowing in a wet smelly basement.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

DAMMIT!!

Please keep John in your thoughts and prayers. His latest CT scan came back and 2 of his lymph nodes are acting up, in his pelvis. This type of cancer really likes to keep showing up. This is his 2nd recurrence of the disease. His regular oncologist (Dr. Swaab.. wonderful wonderful man) wants him to see Dr. Nasta again (she's the Lymphoma specialist at University of Pennsylvania Hospital). They'll decide together the next course of action to take. Most likely more chemo, but a different kind. There is some talk of harvesting John's stem cells to be put back in him at some point. I don't really understand that, but I'm sure I will soon enough.

John was diagnosed in June 2007 with Diffuse Large B-cell Lymphoma, and started chemo on October 2007 until Feb 2008. He was declared in remission at that point. We discovered at that time that his cancer was at Stage 4, so remisson is a miracle! In October 2008, he had CT scans and PET scans for his 6 month check-up. Spots were discovered on his spleen (2 very small spots that were, indeed, cancer). In January 2009, his spleen was removed. Scans showed no cancer present after the surgery. Last week he had another CT scan done because they want to keep a closer eye on this (3 month scans instead of the usual 6 month scans). Again, cancer starting to reel it's ugly head.

John has kept his fighting spirit and wants this taken care of pronto! I'm glad he's not giving up the fight. This one tough old bird, I tell you!

Friday, May 1, 2009

If I Were A Rock Star

I remember doing this on Facebook some time ago. It's an album cover "generator". The rules are below. You don't have to send this to anyone. But it's fun to see what you end up with as a possible album cover. My album cover is below the rules.

Create Your Own Debut Album!

1 - Go to Wikipedia. Hit “Random Article" or click http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first random Wikipedia article that comes up is the name of your band.

2 - Go to Quotations Page and select "random quotations"or click http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four or five words of the very LAST quote on the page is the title of your first album.

3 - Go to Flickr and click on “explore the last seven days”or click http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days
The third picture in the top row, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4 - Use PhotoShop or whatever to put it all together. You can try this: http://wigflip.com/roflbot/


Here is the one I have on Facebook:


This is the one I did for today's post:


It's fun!! Try it!