Friday, October 31, 2008

A little bit about me

I set this blog up, just when I was getting divorced and then never put anything in it. I rediscovered it when my daughter started a blog and she, very nicely, gave me access to it.

My name is Joan, I'm 53 years old, and 4 years ago, at the age of 49 and 23 years of marriage, found out I was being traded in for a 35 year old with no kids (which translates to a nice, always clean, quiet house.) And to make matters worse, it was someone from his office! Made it real easy for them to sneak off to her place at lunch, thus making him available every night for dinner at home and I was none the wiser. (he broke his own rule (not to mention his marriage vows...) never mess with anyone at your job) But the man was not as smart as he thought and I discovered the affair. Within 24 hours of confronting him, I had her name, address, phone number and directions to her house! (never leave your cell phone where your wife can get access to it) I never did anything with it, but he sure shit a brick when I told him that I knew! So much so, that he ended up in the hospital with nearly a stroke the next day! After months of me humiliating myself with begging and pleading, he left for good. (wish I had the guts to throw his sorry ass out the night I found out) It was hard on me, hard on the kids, but with the help of very good friends, co-workers and 3 years of therapy, I'm doing well, I'm happy with my life.

I was resigned to being alone for the rest of my life, when out of nowhere, comes John Russo! We have so much in common it's scary! He is so much more my type than my ex-husband ever was! He's a row house kid from Philly, 4th of 7 kids, raised Catholic, whose parents struggled to make ends meet. I'm a row house kid from Delaware County, PA, 4th of 8 kids, raised Catholic, whose parents struggled to make ends meet. My ex, on the other hand, is 3rd of 6 kids, raised Catholic but grew up country club, in a 5 bedroom large single home and his parents had money. Anyway, John is retired Army (20 years, most with the 82nd Airborne) and works as a security guard for a big chemical company in the greater Philadelphia area. In his spare time, he tutors kids in math and science and preps kids for their SATs.

My 2 older kids like him but, unfortunately, my youngest hates him (for the record, she has never met her step-mother (the slut from the office) and it's been 4 years now. If John and I ever get a place together, I don't know what my youngest is going to do. She has forced me to choose between the 2 of them and because she's a minor and absolutely won't go to her father's house, she has to live with me. But all bets are off when she goes away to college and even my ex thinks we (John and I) should move in together when she goes away. My kid and John can't be in the same room together, which puts me right smack in the middle between them. I know, I know... They are both being immature about all this. So I have to choose between them again. My daughter has forced this issue and has been VERY verbally abusive about it. She would have been perfectly happy if I had been alone all this time so I could be at her beck and call whenever she wanted. But I didn't do that and she doesn't like that one bit. So I get my freedom when she leaves for college and she's more than welcome to go live with daddy on her school breaks. It's MY time to be happy and live my life.

This has been way too much TMI and for that I apologize, but it felt sooo good to get that all out!