Friday, June 24, 2011

Dear So and So

Ah, it's Friday again (I'm writing this on Thursday evening, but all day long I thought it was Friday) and Friday means Dear So and So!  Go visit Kat at 3 Bedroom Bungalow To Let In Crazytown.  She's the genius who dreamed up Dear So and So.  It's a great way to get shit off your chest say stuff you want to say to people but are too polite to do so.   So here's mine.


Dear House guest,
You know I love you, but it's really time for you to get the fuck out of my house go back to Oregon.  I'm sure your mother misses you and that bi-polar brat of yours your darling 2 year old daughter.  It was (ahem) wonderful to see you and I'm sure I'll miss you when you're gone  (OK, even I'm not buying that)  (SATURDAY!!!  doing cartwheels)

Happy to be getting her peace and quiet again,

ps.  and thank you for this GD cold that I can't seem to shake.  I'll be sending you a bill for my cold medicine you helped yourself to and all the missing tips I lost this week .  and all the yogurt your brat ate that was supposed to be my breakfast.


Dear John,
I really do miss you since I haven't seen you since last Tuesday.  I know I've been too sick to make the drive to your house, since you're too stubborn to come here when my youngest in residence.  But that's your problem.  You say you are coming here "to take care of me".  We shall see, since you can't cook to save your life.  I see a lot of take out and food delivery in our very near future.

Love you lots!


Dear Bosses at my job,
Thank you for being understanding when I leave early every day because I really still feel like crap.  And thank you for not forcing me to go to the doctor since I don't have insurance right now, and I really don't want to pay $200 for my doc to tell me I have a cold. (duh!)

Swearing she'll be better soon,


Dear Gina and Gene (aka Eugina),
EIGHT MORE DAYS!!!!!!!  The wedding is in eight more days!!!!  I can't wait to party and have a great time on Daddy Dearest's dime (or $15,000)!!  I'm so happy for the two of you I could just burst!!!

Hoping she's the best mother-in-law ever,


Dear Kimmy at work,
I'm so sorry, dear, but you really are too stupid to be a shift leader.  The fact that you were able to take over my station today at work so I could go home because Jess was selfish and took away your good station for herself before I got to work, was just me being nice.  My fault.  I'm sorry I even told you to finish up the shift at my station.  Trust me.  I won't be doing that again.  Besides, anyone who has 2 children and still insists on being called Kimmy (by people other than your parents and siblings) should not in charge of anything.

Still in charge,


Dear Dani,
OH.  MY.  GOD.  'Smores turnovers are to die for!!!  I'm so glad I only had one though.  Any more would send my glucose levels through the roof!!!!  And dinner was really good tonight.  Thanks for making it so I could hide in my room for a while.



That Janie Girl said...

I'm loving this! Once I figure out how to do it, you're gonna be laughing at me!

I love how you're getting all this stuff off your chest. Now get better, girly! You got lots of fun stuff coming up!

slommler said...

OMG!! The visiting guest from hell, huh? My sympathies!!!
And I hate summer colds...makes life almost unbearable. You just want to crawl into bed and close the drapes and sleep till you feel better.
Hope you feel better soon!!

Garret of Jim and Garret said...

Feel better soon!

Joanna Jenkins said...

I yiyi with the houseguest from hell. So sorry about that.

And even more sorry you're sick :-( Feel better soon so you can party at the wedding!!!!

xoxo jj