BOOBIES!!!!

so what did you think you were going to see......

it's HALLOWEEN time  :-) 

 

Dear So and So

Dear Phillies,

Congratulations on making it to the World Series two years in a row!  You fellas are amazing!!!

A Fan,

Joanie

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Dear Phillies,

Congratulations on winning Game One in the World Series!  Lee did an amazing job with his pitching!  He made it looks so easy!

A Fan,

Joanie

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Dear Spankees,

So you won a game.  Big deal.  Now you're heading to Philly territory.  Watch your backs!

A Phillies fan,

Joanie

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Dear Halloween Candy,

Why, oh why did you jump into my shopping cart on Sunday?  And why oh why do you keep calling me to the pantry?  I'm just glad there are no kids living here right now for me to steal help myself to a few pieces of candy when my kid isn't looking.

Nauseously, 

Chubby

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Dear Angela @ TheSuburban Jungle,

Thank you so much for giving me the Lemonade Stand Award!  I am adding it to my franchise of Lemonade Stands!  I just love getting those recognition awards!

Happily,

Joanie

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Dear John, (no, not THAT kind of Dear John letter) 

Thank you so much for the books for my birthday!  Dan Brown and Patricia Cornwell are my favorite authors!  I can't wait to get into The Lost Symbol and The Scarpetta Factor!

I love you!

Joanie

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Dear Readers,

If you enjoy these Dear So and So's on Fridays, try your own hand at one!  Pop on over to Kat's place, grab her button and put it on your blog!  Put your name on Mr. Linky and you'll be linked right up!  C'mon!  You know you want to!

Blank

I can't think of a damned thing to talk about, except 

Yay Phillies!! You won Game 1!!

And you're worried about squirrels and your bird feeders?

My brother sent this to me in an email.

 

 

 

Riddle Me This!

Those who crave power should be told

That it comes not from owning gold.

Yet is contained in tiny cans

Of carbon, paste and shiny bands.

I'm known by letters and by use,

A poison source of needed use.

as always, credit goes to Tower of the Riddle Master.

Getting Old, From A to Z

My cousin sent this to me via email. I thought I'd share. 

** The poem is from my cousin, the cartoons are my addition.

I'm Getting Old From A to Z...

A is for apple, and B is for boat,

That used to be right, but now it won't float!

Age before beauty is what we once said,

But let's be a bit more realistic instead.

A's for arthritis;

B's the bad back,

C's the chest pains,

perhaps car-d-iac?

D is for dental decay and decline,

E is for eyesight, can't read that top line!

F is for fissures and fluid retention,

G is for gas which I'd rather not mention.

H is high blood pressure--I'd rather it low;

I is for incisions with scars you can show.

J is for joints, out of socket, won't mend,

K is for knees that crack when they bend.

L is for libido, what happened to sex?

M is for memory, I forget what comes next.

N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low;

O is for osteo, the bones that don't grow!

P is for prescriptions, I have quite a few,

just give me a pill and I'll be good as new!

Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu?

R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.

S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears,

T is for Tinnitus; there's bells in my ears!

U is for urinary; big troubles with flow;

V is for vertigo, that's "dizzy," you know.

W is for worry, NOW what's going 'round?

X is for X ray, and what might be found.

Y is another year I'm left here behind,

Z is for zest that I still have-- in my mind.

I've survived all the symptoms, my body's deployed,

And I am keeping twenty-six doctors fully employed!!!

Happy Birthday, John!!

John, boogying with my daughter, Gina at my niece's wedding two weeks ago

Today is John's 57th birthday!  There was a time when we didn't know if he'd make his 55th or 56th or 57th birthday.  With his stubborn aggressive Lymphoma making unwanted appearances over and over, we weren't sure how much time John had left on this earth.  But this tough retired paratrooper wasn't going to let a little thing like cancer stop his life!  See that picture just above?  That was taken on October 10, just 42 days after receiving a stem cell transplant and 48 days after receiving a very high dose of chemo for 5 days straight.  On September 21, just one month to the day after he entered the hospital for transplant, he was back to work, full-time.  He's one tough old bird and I'm absolutely convinced he's going to outlive all of us!  A PET scan in about a month will tell us if the transplant worked.

So, here's to you, John!   You are the love of my life, the reason I smile all the time now.  I hope I get to spend the next 30 years with you, with an option to renew.  Besides, you promised to show me Alaska in all its glory someday. I love you with all my heart! 

Thief!! Thief!! and a MLB FAIL!!

As many of you know, this morning, someone hacked into my checking account and stole $2200.

I never worried about identity theft, because since my divorce, I can't get a credit card, there is $30 in my savings account and any money in my checking account goes out to bills as soon as it comes in.  Little did I know that they could be watching my account and as soon as a decent sized deposit is made, they'd steal the money!

I checked my account on Sunday and there was $99 in there.  My ex-husband sent me a check for $2058 on Saturday and on Monday morning, on my way to work, I deposited it in my checking account.  I knew the funds wouldn't be available until this morning (Tuesday).  I was planning to pay bills after work today.  

Now I don't answer phone calls that are 800 numbers, or calls with area codes I don't recognize.  So around 10 am, I got a phone call that I didn't answer.  I got to work at 11am, and Jess, our part-time accountant told me my bank called about some questionable charges and I should call them right away.  It was the same 800 number that tried to call me this morning.  So I called.

It was someone from my bank but it was OUT-SOURCED to some god-forsaken country (I was NOT happy about this because I couldn't understand him!)  Anyway, he asked me if I spent $680 at Best Buy (uh NO!!),  $506 at ATT (NO!)  $117 at Petmeds (NO!!)  There were 5 or 6 charges in all.  He told me to call my bank immediately and to also file a police report.  I called my branch and she told me to come in right away.  So I had to clock out (I was at work for all of 17 minutes).

So 5 minutes later, I'm at my bank.  Connie had already printed up all the latest charges in the past week.  My checking account had $-78.00 in it.  So I told her the ones that were legitimate and she did some paperwork and made me a copy.  She cut up my check card and issued me a new one (should be here in a few days) .  She was astounded that my account was wiped out!  Then I had to file a police report for fraud.

So off I go to my local police station (please don't ask to see my driver's license for ID because it's expired).  I talked to the Police chief and he took everything down, made a copy of the paperwork from the bank and will fax a copy of the incident report to my bank.  The officer told me this was not unusual.  Lots of folks get wiped out of all their life savings, and often it's way more than $2200!

So I go back to work, but they aren't busy and it's nearly time when the shift leader would be taking me off the floor, so I never got any tables today.  Now I'm out more money!  

Two hours had gone by since I reported the fraud to the bank.  As of right now, $1470 of the $2200 is back in my account and another $739 will be back in a day or so.  There were 2 pre-authorization charges so that money was never actually taken out.  

I am very very happy with my bank right now!  Petra told me when it happened to her a few weeks ago, it took 10 days for her to get her money back!  Now if I can just get my bank to stop charging me $35 every time I bounce a check, I'll be real happy!


On another note, last night the Major League Baseball network, MLB.com posted this picture, below,  on their website before the game ended, proclaiming the LA Dodgers as winners of Game 4.  FAIL MLB!!!   Phillies got 2 runs at the bottom of the 9th inning with 2 outs to win that game 5 - 3!!  Like my daughter says, no apology from MLB but they did pull the picture.  Fail, MLB, fail!
 

I'm cranky

Today I'm cranky. I didn't wake up cranky, but by the time breakfast was ready (OK, so it was 1 pm) I was on my way to a major hissy fit!

It all started when I came downstairs and started breakfast. Now you have to remember that John can't cook his way out of anything, so he has absolutely no room to open his mouth about anything I'm doing in the kitchen. Even my ex-husband, who could cook rings around me in the kitchen, knew to keep his mouth shut when I was cooking.

I started making bacon.  Now, in order for the bacon to still be relatively hot and not completely burnt to a crisp, I cook it to about a medium and put it in the oven on paper towels to stay warm and finish cooking.  By the time the eggs and toast are ready, the bacon is perfect!  

So I was removing the bacon from the pan, John comes in and says, "Oh!  I see you like your bacon rare."   Uh, no.  Don't you remember 2 weeks ago, when I cooked it partway and finished it on the oven?   I also added I really didn't like criticism of my cooking because that's what this sounds like.    He said Oh no!  I was just trying to give you some pointers!  POINTERS!!!!  This from a man who has a freezer stocked with Hungry man dinners, easy mac and microwavable chili in his kitchen cabinets!

I know how to cook.  I'm a damned good cook.  The fact that I haven't cooked much since my ex-husband left doesn't mean I don't know how to cook.  This isn't the first time he's said something to me when I was in the midst of preparing a meal.  John has told me a few times that his last wife was "a gourmet cook".  I think that means she peeled her own potatoes and made whipped cream from scratch.   He also told me her cooking has won awards.  Big shit.  So has mine (OK so it was $10 from the local newspaper but my recipe won that week!)      

I told John is he keeps up with the left-handed compliments, it will be the last time I cook and we can eat all our meals out... and he's buying!

PS  How about them Phils!  Beating the Dodgers in Game 3 11 -0!! Woo hoo!!!

Bored, so here's a little meme

OK, I'm bored.  And I can't think of a damn thing to write about tonight.  So while surfing the blogs, I found this meme at Harriet's blog that I found interesting.  It's short.  Do.  Or do not.  (Yoda said that.  Well, actually he said, "Do or do not.  There is no try.")

Saturday 9: Inside Job

1. When you were young, what did you want to be when you grew up?
a nun.

2. Did you ever pursue that career?
no way!  but my sister did!

3. If you are not in that field, what changed?
I discovered boys!

4. What is your current job?
server

5. What's the best part of what you do?
meeting all kinds of people

6. Do you have plans to do something else down the road?
spoil grandchildren (have none yet) and travel

7. How did you get your present job? If you are a stay at home mom, how long did you need to plan that move?

TGI Fridays was hiring and I was out of a job (we closed our restaurant)

8. Did your parents influence your choices of jobs over the years?

Nope!  Mom made me take secretarial courses in high school so I could get a job in an office.  I applied for a scholarship to hairdressing school and won a full scholarship!  So I was a hairdresser.  The secretarial courses came in handy.  I took all my notes in shorthand!

9. What advice would you give your children on careers?

Do what you love.  And love what you do.  And don't settle.

6 of your favorite sweet treats in the whole world

1. cherry pie
   
2. Margaritas
3. chocolate eclair ice cream bars
   
4. Breyers cherry vanilla ice cream
   
5. Breyers Butter Almond Ice Cream
   
6. Payday candy bars
   

Dear So And So

Dear Mother Nature,

Back to back Nor'easters?  Seriously?  I'm freezing my ass off!  It's only mid-October!  Go away for a couple of months!

Ch-ch-chilly,

J-J-Joanie

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Dear Mom,

It's hard to believe that 10 years have passed since you left us.  I sure hope you're keeping an eye on us up there along with Dad.  It's good to know I have angels in my corner when my time comes.  I miss you.

Love,

Joan (never Joanie with you)

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Dear Phillies,

Man!!  You sure know how to keep the heart rate going!  That was some game last night!  Way to hold on to the lead and win the game!

A Phillies Phan,

Joanie

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Dear Fridays Guests,

It's good to see you all again!  Little by little, you're coming back in.  I've missed you a lot!  Bring some friends along with you next time!  My bank account is beginning to smile again.

Sincerely,

Joanie

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Dear Jerry,

I hope you're having a great time on your vacation in Ireland and England!  I'm so jealous that I'm not there too.  Never mind that I wasn't even invited.  I still wish I was there.  I hope your bitchy friend isn't keeping the 3 of you from having a terrific time!  I'll talk to you when you get home.

Slàinte,

Siobhan

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Dear Peggy aka Sis,

We sure had a great time at Patty and Trey's wedding!  You throw a terrific party!  

Love,

Joanie

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Dear John,

You sure surprised me on Saturday when I saw you dancing with Gina at Patty's wedding!  You've told me that you used to dance a lot, but I had no idea you actually could DANCE!!  Now I have to learn some of those dances so I can try to keep up with you!

I love you!

Joanie

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Dear Readers,

Want to try your hand at a Dear So and So?  Pop on over to Kat's Place at Three Bedroom Bungalow To Let In Crazytown, grab a button, and link your post to Mr. Linky!   Go on!  It's fun!!!

Love,

Joanie

 

Riddle Me This!

Chubby Fellow, swinging slow,

Not on a jungle vine.   

Taken from his leafy home,

But not for jam or wine.

Has lost its weight while soaking rays,

Then joining you to dine.

As always, credit goes to Tower of the Riddle Master

What A Surprise! and pics!!

Yesterday, John and I went to my niece's wedding.  We had a lovely time!  The reception was terrific, with an open bar, a buffet during the cocktail hour and a dinner buffet (with chicken, crabcakes and prime rib!)  They also had a DJ, of course for music and dancing.  

John doing The Twist with my daughter, Gina

I was sitting there, chatting with one of my brothers.  I happen to glance over at the dance floor and what do I see?  John doing the twist (and doing a terrific job, I might add!) with my daughter, Gina!  Was I surprised!  I had just finished telling my sister, Jeanne that we are now the old people at weddings, watching the young people dance!  LOL!  

The Electric Slide!

A little while later, there is John again, with my niece, Shannon,  doing the Electric Slide!  This man had rhythm!  No robotic moves you usually see when men dance! 


He then tried to teach me the Cotton-eyed Joe and a waltz on the dance floor.  Sigh.  Sadly, I spent the better part of 40 years with men and boys who didn't know how to dance other than the slow back and forth dance.

The happy couple, Patty (my niece) and Trey 

Apparently, when John was stationed at Ft. Benning, GA and newly divorced (he was early 30s), he dated a dance instructor and she taught him all kinds of dances, ballroom and trendy!   He used to go to Country Western bars and dance all night long!  And he doesn't drink!  No liquid courage for John!  Of course this always impressed the ladies!  


So, when someone in the family puts wedding pics up, I'll post them.  Hopefully there will be one of two of Fred Astaire doing his thing!

** So far, there's one picture up on facebook.  I'll keep checking and adding as I find them.

A Message from Clark Kent's Lunchbox

Ron Mattocks, author the blog Clark Kent's Lunchbox wrote a post about Mattel Toys and the newest doll in the American Girl Doll Series.  Her name is Gwen and she's a homeless child.  I thought this was a joke at first, only to discover that they were quite serious when they produced this doll.  To make it even worse, the back story for this doll is her father is a deadbeat dad and left the family and now they are homeless. 

Read his blog post with the letter he wrote to the CEO of Mattel Toys, Robert Eckert.  It's interesting reading.

Why I Hate Mattel Toys' CEO, Robert Eckert.

Oldest Showgirl in the World!

Y'all need to click on this link and meet Dorothy Dale Kloss.  She is absolutely amazing!  I want to be her when I grow up!

http://bulletin.aarp.org/yourworld/articles/Dorothy_Dale_Kloss_Oldest_Showgirl_in_the_World.html

Wordless... Friday?

Doesn't this little girl look positively evil???

Travel Tip Thursday ... Peaceful times at Peace Valley Park

Peace Valley

I wrote this entry in April 2009.  I love this place!  It's one of my favorite places to visit with John.  I need to get back out there soon with my camera to take what I'm sure are amazing photos of the leaves turning.

So, enjoy Peace Valley Park.  The name alone calms me.

 

Yesterday (Sunday) was such an absolutely glorious day that John and I took a ride to our favorite park. It's in Bucks County, PA, in the town of Chalfont. It's called Peace Valley Park. The lake in the park is called Lake Galena. I just love it there. Of course, I took my camera from it's hiding place in my car into the house the other night. So I had no camera to take any pictures! I hope I remember it for the next time. I found these pictures via google.

The plan was to go to the park and walk the path around the reservoir. But once we got there, we both felt a little lazy and decided to stake out a picnic table and do some people watching. It was a great plan!

I was amazed how many people were in the water doing various things! Granted, it was about 90 degrees outside but that water had to be COLD! I had my heat on just 3 or 4 days ago!

There is a fairly large lake at the park. No motor craft is allowed on the water but sailboats, kayaks, canoes, row boats are allowed.

There was a fellow on a windsurfer and he was zipping up and down the lake! It was a great breezy day for sailboats and windsurfers. We saw a sunfish sailboat, but we don't think the folks in it were very proficient at sailing. We also saw 14 foot sailboat and that man looked like he was enjoying himself!

I was surprised how many kayakers there were in the water! If you flip a kayak, you're UNDER the boat until you flip it back! I don't think I'm brave enough to paddle a kayak. We also saw a pair of canoers.

There were lots of families at the park, having picnics. Some of the kids were even splashing in the water, along with a few dogs. I don't think you'll see me in the water until July. I hate swimming in cold cold water.

I like this park because you can bring your bike and ride the trails or walk. You can bring you pet and walk him (bring a pooper scooper and bags!)

John and I have decided that we need to start packing a picnic and leaving our chairs, blanket, cooler, etc. in my car so it's always ready for when we want to spend the day at the park.

Two summers ago, John and I rented a sailboat for 1/2 a day. It was a nice warm day in July, with a gentle breeze. We got the sail up, John gave me some quick instruction and off we went! Just as we got to the center of the lake, the wind died! And there we sat, turning this way and that, trying to catch a breeze to get us moving again. I bet we spent the better part of an hour, trying to get moving again. We finally got the sailboat to the beach! Next time, we'll make sure there's a good breeze blowing and I'll make sure I bring a t-shirt or something to cover up, in case we get stranded again! 



Check out Pseudo's blog (she lives in Hawaii.  incredible!) and find others who participate in Travel Tip Thursday.  Maybe even tell about one of your favorite places and leave a link so we can all  read about your favorite places to visit!

Random Tuesday Thoughts

Boy, is David Letterman in some trouble these days!  With him coming clean about the Blackmail scheme by a former producer of his show, he got himself in hot water with former employees and the network and his wife.  Methinks he's got a lotta 'splainin' to do!

John and I are on a quest to find sugar free beverages that do not contain Aspartame.  Not an easy undertaking.  We're also trying to find out if the report that aspartame is the cause of folks being misdiagnosed with MS and Lupus. Could explain the joint and muscle pain I get these days (can't possibly be from getting old and being fat)  I'll let you know what I find out!  AH!!!  Snopes.com says this story is FALSE!  We wondered if maybe the makers of Splenda and Truvia weren't the ones responsible for putting this story out there to scare folks away from those products.

My niece is getting married on Saturday and on that day she will become Patty Duke!  

I'm still trying to wrap my brain around the fact that my youngest child, who is a freshman theatre major in college, will be portaying a dead slut in the one act play she was cast in.    Last fall,  she was Abigail in her school's production of The Crucible and the year before, she was cast as Amayzing Mayzie La Bird (the bird who find herself "with egg" after a vacation and leaves her egg to be cared for by Horton the Elephant so she can have fun and party) in Seussical the Musical.  Do you think she's being type cast??  All these naughty roles!  

Isn't it too early to turn the heat on?  It's only the first week of October, but the temps at night are beginning to drop into the high 40s and my ass is cold!  Fortunately, the days are still in the high 60s, low to mid 70s. Time to pull out the throw blankets and hoodies!

While I'm typing this, the TV is on in the other room.  Craig Ferguson is now on and he's being very funny because David Letterman is his boss and he's supposed to talk about the top news story of the day and make fun of it.  Guess what the top story is?  You got it!!  David Letterman!  Craig is going on and on about how he's probably going to lose his job but he sure hopes he's funny if what he's saying causes him to lose his job! 

So I got to work for 53 minutes today.  I got to work, did my set up side work, joked to my shift leader that my OTLEs (option to leave early work) were finished and I could go.  So she sent me home!  I was kidding!!!  Apparently the one boss has decided if you don't get a table by noon, you get sent home.  It's ok.  I'll return the favor when I'm shift leader later in the week.

Rio De Janiero, Brazil won the bid for the Summer Olympics 2016.  Just think of the money that was wasted by our illustrious President and his wife as they flew to Denmark in 2 separate planes to try to win the bid for Chicago to get the Olympics.  And Chicago came in dead last.  The cost of the plane fuel alone could have been used for better things.  And yes, I'm not a fan.   

And what about them Phils!  Winning the National League East Championship!  Now we have to get past the Colorado Rockies to win the National League Pennant before moving on the World Series!.  Go Phils!!!! 

Hey!  Want to try your hand at Random Tuesday Thoughts?  Just pop on over to  The Un Mom, add your name to Mr. Linky, then see all the other randomness that's there!

Riddle Me This!

I think this one is fairly easy.

Boiling pool beneath the ground.

Wake up!  Wake up!

Donuts drowned.

As always, credit goes to Tower of the Riddle Master