Friday, July 10, 2009
Dear So and So... healthcare edition
Dear BK free wifi,
WHY don't you have a back button on this service? It really sucks to have to close everything down and start all the f*** over to use this computer. And why does your free wifi shut down the one I'm using repeatedly. As soon as I pay my comcast bill, I'm divorcing you.
Dear Tri-care Health Insurance,
WHY, now that John is ready to do this transplant, are you questioning the choice of hospital and doctor he is seeing? Why does he need to get a referral from his primary care physician when his oncologist sent him to that hospital because you wouldn't let him go to the one his doc wanted him to see? It was YOUR idea to him to go to HUP (an excellent hospital... we are not disputing that) If you hold up his care and he gets sicker, he will sue your ass. There's a good reason he calls you Try-to-get-Care Insurance.
Dear US Army,
Why have you reneged on your promise of free healthcare for life when John agreed to give 20 years of his life to serving our country. Now you make him pay co-pays and premiums. YOU get to choose where he goes for care and what doctors he sees. If he tried to go to the VA hospital, it takes months to get an appointment, and the care is frightening at best. Don't you want your veterans who served honorably to live to a ripe old age?
Dear Corporate Bosses where I work,
I agreed to use your health insurance and cancelled the exhorbitant insurance I had that sucked anyway. Now you're telling us open enrollment is only in January. If I need to see a doctor before then, expect to get the bills sent to your office for payment. Or maybe I'll marry my boyfriend for his health insurance... it's still cheaper than what I have and it covers more.
Dear Dr with the unpronouncable Russian name,
$180?? Really? For bronchitis? Sorry... didn't realize I was paying off your student loans. Stand in line lady, if you expect to get paid for what my lousy insurance didn't cover.
Former Patient who's looking for a new doc
Dear Max and Irma's,
Brace yourself. We're coming over after our movie tonight and I think I have a big-ass margarita with my name on it!