Friday, January 7, 2011

Dear So and So: Going Postal... and other fun stuff

Yay!!  It's Friday!  Time to get some stuff off my chest!!  It's also Follow Friday, 40 and over!

Dear Ex-husband,
While it was very nice of you to be concerned that I might be having a heart attack when my phone accidentally pocket-dialed your phone and you heard background noises but no talking from me, you really must know that you are probably the LAST person I'd call in a medical emergency.  Frankly, I'd leave that up to my kids to inform you, if they chose to do so.

Get over yourself,
The one you let get away


Dear Asswipe who works at the Post Office,
Was it really necessary to get all dramatic in front of other customers when I had to go back to your Post Office because my daughter gave me the wrong address to send her package?  I was gone for 15 minutes, for Pete's sake! AND I apologized!    And "all the paperwork" that was required to be filled out was done by ME, not YOU, asswipe!  I even stepped aside to let others go in front of me, so I wasn't holding them up.  You really didn't need to mutter that the changes had to be done anyway!  You wouldn't know courtesy if it bit you in the ass!

Lucky I didn't "go postal" on you,
your favorite customer on Tuesday


Dear Walmart,
Thanks for the new glasses!  I love them!  You were far more reasonable, financially, than my other eye doctor!  And thanks for suggesting I use my AARP membership!  That knocked $132 off the cost of the glasses!!  And Leo was awesome at helping me choose the right frames!   I'll definitely be a returning customer and will recommend you to everyone!

Happy happy happy,
A very satisfied customer


Dear Trey,
OK, 2 weeks ago, you were my hero.  Now when the hell are you coming back to fix the leaky water heater and to make sure my water stays hot?  Hmmmm???  I have to hit the reset button whenever I need hot water.  I sure hope this isn't one of those "you get what you pay for" times.  And if you need to buy a part because you did something to make it not work, YOU are paying for it, not me.

Thinking of divorce,
"Aunt" Joanie


Dear Snow,
Thanks for stopping after only a few hours.  Now John can still come to my house tonight, as planned!  It looks so pretty when I look out my window, especially since I know I don't have to drive in you!  Oh!  And it really isn't necessary for you to make another appearance early on Tuesday, my first day back to work.  Feel free to arrive anytime after 4 pm ET.  I'll be home by then.

Love you when I'm safely at home,


Dear Friends,
If you like Dear So and So, and want to give it a try, just pop over to Kat's Place at Three Bedroom Bungalow, hook up with her Linky and add your own!  It's a great way to blow off steam, and you can read lots of other letters!



Yaya' s Home said...

Well, I have a Linky, but I can't seem to figure out how to make it work. Rather than let it win, I gave up. haha

Loved your post. In fact, I hadda' call my good hubby-buddy in to check it out. Too funny. I sure hope you get your hot water heater workin'. An' by the way, that special note to Snow was ingenious. Maybe I'll have a little visit with our snow.

PS ~ My word verification word is cinoin. Whaddya' s'pose that means? Cinnamon with onions? Hmmmm.

~ Yaya

Garret of Jim and Garret said...

You butt dialed. LOL.

Water heater? LOL, you refrained from saying "hot water heater".

Post office? They suck.

Joanie said...

@Garret, I pocket-dialed. The phone was in my coat pocket. And the water is NOT hot, so just water heater.

@Yaya, the linky will show up when you publish. It took me a bit to figure that out when I suddenly had 3 of them on a blog post!

Yvonne said...

LOL! Great post!

Happy Friday! I'm a new follower.

Joanie said...

@Yvonne, Hi! I just wrote a blog post about your challenges! It goes up tomorrow afternoon!

Joanne said...

That's what I have missed -- Dear So and so's. Thanks for making my first ones to read in the new year so fabulous.

Kathy said...

I always enjoy your Dear So and So letters! The one to your ex was hilarious.

slommler said...

Oh don't you just love good customer service?? Ha!
The one to your ex is so funny...that sounds like a guy thing for sure!!
And I will have to try Walmart when it is time for my new glasses. Thanks for the heads up!!
Hope you get your water heater fixed soon?!

Kat said...

I can't believe the postal worker got huffy! I guess that is the difference between having to deal with real postal agents and dealing with guys in a military uniform who do the postal agents job. The military guys at my post office know me by name and know what books I am into and my kids names and what type of mail rate I want when they ring me up (as cheap as possible). I am in there roughly 3 times a week to mail things (mostly books that I swap online).